time frames

i was just thinking while i was eating supper tonight about how zen estimated that the apartment in concord would take a couple of years to get into about 3 months or so ago when i applied there. now that they've told me i basically have the apartment (from my understanding)- he says i'll get moved in there in about 3 or 4 months.. i'm not sure if he's bad at estimating time it takes to live places or if he's just making up a number so i don't get my hopes up too early? if he doesn't know- i think it's better for him to admit he doesn't know instead of basically letting me down with the estimation. oh well.. i have enough intelligence not to think he knows the time it will take, although it's kinda nice knowing about how long it'd take- not just guesses. i've been re-posting the videos i have of myself first walking at the courage center back when i was going there- the file has the date #'s in it- they go all the way back to 2013.. so that's THIRTEEN YEARS AGO. SO TO ANY FAMILY MEMBERS WANTING ME TO GO BACK TO COURAGE KENNY.. I'M DONE WITH THAT SHIT. THIRTEEN MOTHER FUCKIN YEARS AGO. DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT OR DO YOU NEED YOUR IN-LAWS TO EXPLAIN THAT TO YOU? WELL THEY'LL PROBABLY JUST TRY TO DISREGARD THE WORK I'VE ALREADY DONE (that's also a type of mental abuse.. BECAUSE EVERYONE REALIZES HOW MUCH THEY TRY TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF CLIENTS- SO THEY STOP GOING THERE AND COURAGE KENNY IS JUST DESPERATE FOR CLIENTS SO THEY LIE AND IGNORE THE TIME AND WORK THEIR PAST CLIENTS HAVE ALREADY DONE. they use the term "gaslighting" to explain that kind of psychological ABUSE. AMANDA SHOULD KNOW THAT THOUGH SINCE SHE KNOWS EVERYTHING! how the hell would SHE like to have all the hard work she's done ignored so people that don't care about her can take advantage of her by ignoring it.. ALSO why i say she LACKS empathy.) this is the shit i'm expected to take while staying in this stupid goalless state for other people's convenience and benefit. so i hope jem can see why it's taken so long for me to finally get there. by now- i don't need a bungee on me to hold me up while i walk. i fall every now and then but i always get my ass back up. "DON'T BE A BITCH." in the words of kevin hart.. so i DON'T stay down and play victim like certain parents like to be viewed for attention. for anyone who truly cares about me- they have knowledge that i've progressed PAST that bullshit at courage kenny seeing as i've found videos which are THIRTEEN YEARS OLD. amanda doesn't have time to take knowledge of that as long as i look disabled, she can play their game and ignore ALL the work i've done already so she can look "caring" or "supportive" or wtf else she wants to look when she can't even check on me when i have the emergency room call her when i went a while ago. i don't remember the last time i spoke to her and i'm not even gonna waste my time trying to call her because SHE DOESN'T RETURN CALLS and i don't wanna look like i'm begging for attention from someone who doesn't give a shit. so go make up lies to all our relatives and cooliez hair stylist buddies telling them shit that isn't true because i don't even remember the last time i spoke to her. GOD FORBID THAT I ACTUALLY FIND A PLACE TO LIVE WHICH ISN'T IN THIS OPPORTUNITY-LESS STATE THAT DOESN'T MAKE HER OR ANY OF MY OTHER NEGLIGENT FAMILY MEMBERS APPEAR "CARING"! har har har.. she's not gonna move outta this state! she's not smart enough to do so.. isn't that what you told dustin?! I CAN'T DO ANYTHING WITHOUT YOUR EGOTISTICAL ASSISTANCE. i'm stupid compared to you because i have a brain injury and YOU DON'T. RIGHT? i'm not qualified to do anything but mindlessly attend courage kenny and let them take advantage of my advocate-less ass. SO I'M BETTING THAT GETS YOU POINTS WITH YOUR IN-LAW BECAUSE YOU GOT HER ANOTHER CLIENT SHE CAN TAKE ADVANTAGE OF AND KEEP HER THERE, DOING THE SAME UNHELPFUL SHIT WHILE BEING PAID BY INSURANCE TO HELP HER BUT SHE'S STUPID BECAUSE SHE HAS A TRAUMATIC *BRAIN* INJURY- SO THAT MEANS SHE CAN'T POSSIBLY BE ANY SMARTER THAN YOUR ENTITLED SELF AND SHE CAN'T POSSIBLY HAVE ANYTHING BETTER TO DO WITH HER LIFE BUT WASTE HER TIME AT SOME FACILITY WHO REFUSES TO ACKNOWLEDGE HER ABILITY AND CAPABILITY! SHE'S STUPID BECAUSE SHE HAS A BRAIN INJURY!